Frank & Debbie

(Editor’s Note: Frank and Debbie took turns writing this article.)

Frank: The time we first met we were both in different relationships. Into the second year of that relationship, my girlfriend and I had a fight and we needed to spend the evening away from each other. So, I took my bike and went out with some friends to a local restaurant. My friends and I later went to a bike event.

One of the guys we knew from the group of people we rode with had a new girlfriend and was introducing her to the group. Her name was Debbie and he was bragging about how hot she was. They had been dating about three months. He is a player and the first time I saw Debbie my first thought was ‘that she is way too nice a girl to be with him.’

I said to my friend, what is a gorgeous girl like her doing with him? How did he pull that one off? I wish I had found her before I got involved with my girlfriend.

Debbie: The first time I met Frank I was amazed. I thought he was a beatitiful man and I said to myself, “God why can’t I find someone like him.” After a few hours of talking I knew instantly we had some type of connection. One of the first things he did was take out his iPhone and showed me pictures of his children. Being very family oriented I knew this was a family man and I prayed for someone like him. Little did I know he was having difficulties in his relationship just as I was. Over the course of the next year we would run into each other while out on dates at bike events. Both of us being in relationships we never said or did anything to give the other any idea that we were both envious of each others’ boyfriend and girlfriend.

Frank lived in a townhouse on the bay and I lived in an apartment adjacent to a park directly across the bay from the town home. Neither of us knew where the other lived and never talked to each other other than running into each other a few times while out on dates. Both of our relationships ended the same month. I would go out in the evenings and walk in the park. I would sit on the park bench overlooking the water at the town homes across the bay, asking myself, “Where is the man of my dreams?”

Frank: At the same time I was sitting on my balcony overlooking the bay at the park across the water asking for the same thing.  Neither of us knew the other was looking across the water at the same time.

The bike event that we both would go to was held every Wednesday night. A local restaurant would have a live band and bikes of all types would gather for food and music. On a Wednesday evening after a month of sitting alone both of us got the idea to go to the event. I went alone and Debbie took her 12-year-old son to show him the bikes.

After being there for about 20 minutes, I looked up and saw Debbie sitting and talking to some people. I had heard Debbie and her boyfriend had broken up but never expected to run into her. She never came to the event other than with her boyfriend who had introduced her to it. I wondered if she had a new boyfriend and figured it was worth finding out. Debbie had no idea that I had broken up with my girlfriend. I went up to her and said hi. She asked me where my girlfriend was and I told her about how we had broken up a month before. We walked around looking at bikes and shopping at the vendors. She introduced me to her son and I noticed him admiring a baseball cap with west coast choppers on it and purchased it for him. And we compared breakup stories. It was getting late and her son had to get to bed. I suggested that she take him home and I would call her at home. We exchanged phone numbers and both went home.

One hour later we were on the phone talking. We found out that we were both very attracted to each other from the very first time we met. We found that we both had very similar backgrounds. We both grew up in close families who would go RV camping on the weekends. We both married young to our high school sweethearts and were divorced after only one year. They both then remarried and had two kids and both after 13 years ended up separating. Both then had a relationship with someone who turned out to be not what they appeared to be and broke up at almost exactly the same time.

That night our conversation lasted until 4 a.m. We both were looking for the same things in a mate. The next day I went to her apartment and took her to lunch. We hung out for the next three days getting to know each other. It was Friday and Debbie had plans to go to visit her parents for the weekend.

The weekend seemed to take forever. Being a businessman I decided to handle Debbie like a business deal. When Debbie got back we spent about a few weeks interviewing each other. Since we had both been burned before we wanted to be sure that this was what we were looking for. I spoke with Debbie’s friends, sister, brother-in-law, and even her ex-husband. Debbie did the same to try to get an accurate history. All her references confirmed that she was a loving, caring and faithful mother and wife. We had a meeting to discuss the relationship and go over the interview results. Both of us were completely satisfied and sure that this is what we wanted. We spent almost every day of the next two months together.

Frank and Debbie: Frank worked from home and Debbie worked part time so we had a lot of days together. Debbie only returned to her apartment briefly to check on things and get extra clothes and toys for the kids. All of our children got along great. Since they are all about the same age they had common interests and enjoyed having live-in friends.

After two months, things were going so well that Debbie gave up her apartment and moved in. The three-bedroom townhouse was a tight fit for all six of us.

After another two months, we decided we needed a bigger place and purchased a five-bedroom house. We made a pact that no matter what happens or if we have a fight we would never ever mention breaking up. It is not an option and is never even discussed. Just before we got the new house we got engaged and plan to get married within the next year. Over the past year we have been together almost constantly. We wake up together, spend the entire day together, and go to bed together. Since Debbie has changed jobs and now works for the family real-estate company, she works from the house with me and never has to leave my side.

With the addition of a puppy the family was complete. Almost. A baby is planned immediately after the wedding next month and will be the glue that binds all the children together. She will be sister to all four of them.

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